Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

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If life gives you melons, you have dyslexia.

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

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I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

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What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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What do you get if you cross a motorway with a lawnmower? Killed.

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You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

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Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

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What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

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knock knock whos there? your neighbor, dude im sorry but i swear i didnt see your kid on my drive way.

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Why isnt there any mexicans on star trek? Because even in the future they dont work.

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When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

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Why was Helen Keller depressed? She was deaf and blind.

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When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

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Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

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What's faster a hungry black guy or a car? A car

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Andy: Mom, I wish I was a dinosaur. Mom: Aw, that's cute! Why? Andy: Because dinosaurs do not suffer from terminal pancreatic cancer.

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What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

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What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

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your momma is so fat she has diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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