What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If black guys really have big packages, why are there standards so low, they prefer fat girls? I don't know, but prejudice and racism is wrong dickhead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? He is suicidal and should probably get help.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I once had a friendly cohort, whose limericks often ran short, but this one doesn't, I don't know why, Also, he often can't rhyme.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A chicken walks into a barn.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the little girl cry? She lives in Haiti.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

It's a penguin that breathes by its asshole. One day, he sits down, and he dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is the name of Steven Hawkins condom.... Anti virus

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock. Who's there? Mike. Oh, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get a person to stop talking to you? Ask nicely to please be quiet and let me talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Henry fall down the stairs? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Poor Henry.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats better at driving? A pig or a chicken. Neither because they are animals and it is impossible for the to even posses the power of controlling a moving vehicle.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was little Jimmy so sad? Because he was H.I.V. positive

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Who row's? •Liam Findlay

thumb_up thumb_down -7

2 sheeps are outside having a great time One sheep walks up to the other sheep and says: hello The other sheep says: hello Now what I want to know: what ally do you get your drugs from

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colour blind Which is sometimes quite annoying

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the blind and deaf kid get for christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the plane say to the twin towers? Boom

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops