How does Michael J. Fox mix his paint? He uses the paint mixing stick that is provided, for free, by most reputable hardware stores.

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Q: Why did the kid drop his icecream cone? A: Because he couldn't hold it he lost his arms in a car accident.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You really can't, but you could grab it and shake it around so it looks like its dancing.

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What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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Knock knock, Whos there? Your adopted.

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What happened to the toddler on the swing? She was left unatended and was raped.

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Doctor: Knock, Knock Patient: Who's there? Doctor: The interupting doctor Patient: The interruptin.... Doctor: You have aids.

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Why? Why not?

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding the holocaust? A worm

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Why was the black man driving a plane? because he was a pilot, you racist.

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Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

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I forgot what i was gonna say

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made the man who said shut up mad so he told the man to shut up.

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A lady with alzheimers walks up to her friend and says" my nefew died today" and her friend replied.. " no he died three years ago."

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

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Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

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Dislike this joke for a cookie However if you like this joke you dont get a cookie

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You know what is totally sick? A person with stage II cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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