Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

what has two eyes and a face? the 5 year old who got raped on his way back home last night.

What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

why did the koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead

2 men walked into a bar. the other one ducked.

A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

So a guy with a machine gun walks into a bank, makes a deposite and leaves.

Pull my finger ouch..

Guy: guess what girl: what Guy: nevermind girl: no what Guy: i love you girl:.. i love myself too..

Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

What is more worse than death? Death

Knock knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? NOTHING, because NOTHING rhymes with orange!

i put a oie in the oven, it baked

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

What's white and horny? a unicorn.

A dancer walks into a barre

A can walks into a bar...HAHAHAHA JK LOL thats not possible! What was I thinking? Silly me! -David Bruggen

What's blue, wriggles around, and sits in a corner? A dying baby in a plastic bag. What's green, doesn't wriggle around, and sits in a corner? A Christmas tree. The current homeowners were never made aware of the atrocity committed by the previous occupants.

A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

Your mom is so fat, that your gonna get a brother soon.

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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