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"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

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“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

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Why did Billy Bob kidnap Jamal? Because he finds the African American community fascinating and is unable to start up a regular conversation due to the over-amplified stereotype that rednecks usually kidnap and/or kill black people. Therefore, kidnapping Jamal was necessary so that he could have a conversation with him about his heritage and background.

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Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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what is purple and fly? - a purple flying.

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood? I don't know. The woodchuck won't chuck wood.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you, but then i took and arrow to the Elbow.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Q- Why did spongbob go to Detroit? A- He didn't, spongbob is not real. And even if he was, Detroit is not a very popular tourist attraction.

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Here is a nursery rhyme: Jane is a scruff, she has a head full of nits. She also had pain in her great big... Now don't get excited. Don't be mislead. Because all that Jane had was a pain in her head!

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whats the difference between a white jew and a black jew the black jew is treated poorly and is sent to the back of the gas chamber

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Jokes related to finding a worm in an apple.

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my wife came out of the kitchen....

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Racial Equality

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What do you call a black man driving a helicopter? Blackhawk down

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Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

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What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

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Whoever said "don't start what you can't finish" hopefully didn't think about having kids Cuz that would be horror Get it?

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Saggy Nipples By chan chan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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