Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

I used to tell people: step on my foot on purpose and ill FUCKlNG BREAK YOURS! Then I Evolved.. friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Thumb me down or step on my foot if only on mistake, and I will break off both your legs and ram them up your ASS!

Q: What did the schizophrenic man say to his father? A: "Every time grandmother's urn shrieks, this pornography turns to black ink."

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

minorities

Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they stink.

what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

I AM SATAN, YOU SHALL LOVE ME BEFORE EVERYBODY ELSE! YOU SHALL STONE THY INSOLENT CHILDREN! THY SHALL R*PE AND KILL IN MY NAME! YOU SHALL HANG MY SON ON THE CROSS WHICH I SACRIFICED BECAUSE HE IS IMMORTAL/BECAUSE I LOVE YOU? "Moral" "Man": Joke is on you, who do you think I am, God?

Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

Mel Gibson and a Jew walk into a bar They proceed to have a pleasant conversation and both take taxis home

A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

Johnny tried talking to his dog, there was no response.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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