What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

what should you say when your mates nan is in hospital with a broken leg??? ha ha my nan can stand up shes just genetically better

An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

What's the difference between an elephant and a duck? Purple.

Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

Hey, have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. Neither has he.

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

When life gives you lemons, you should be wondering how "life" managed to give you those lemons.

You know whats worse than finding a fly in your soup? 9/11

How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

How do you circumsize a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.

Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL THIS JOKE??? A: Another joke you didn't think was funny... REFRIGERATOR!! O.k. Now it's funny!

What do you call a Mexican hot dog? Lunch.

What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

what is the coolest thing in the world? hashtag swagbag yolo

a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

A mormon walked into a bar and realised it was a bar the he leaves

Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

Why did the black man crash his car? His low-income job forced him to buy a toyota.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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