Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

It's not illegal, it's just frowned upon... like... masterbating on an airplane.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

How do you tell if someone likes butter? You ask them

knock knock who's there? penis in penis in who? penis in you

How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

This is Heading 1

A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

24

What's round and orangey? An orange.

2 girls talking to each other: brunette: Christmas is on Friday this year blonde: let's hope its not on Friday the 13th!!!!!

A man and his son cross the street, the man hears a screaming noise and ignores it, the man gets across and notice his wife missing...

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I dont know so why are you asking?

Why did the woman cross the road? Trick question, she didn't because she was in the kitchen.

Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

What's Kanye West's main goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

What do vampires cross the sea in?

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

What happens when a right turn is finally made in NASCAR? The driver has successfully changed his tires and has been refueled, now he is pulling out of pit lane.

What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

ronald wants to join a gym, they tell him to lose 20 pounds before coming back or else.....

Whats two plus two? Miles