What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My dick

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Yo momma so fat that when she sat on the bible jesus poped out.

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What did Grandma give little Ben for Christmas? a wheelchair

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Roses are red Violets are red Your flowers are red Yes set your garden on fire

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

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It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What do you get when do you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence.

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If it bothers you? I am just saying that, fucking alright ill be slightly less cruel, I mean come on! It does not matter shit what others think! If someone ever tries to assault you because you are associated with me (yeah it happens), I will stand in front of you and KILL (and possibly rape) THEM!

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What did the P.E. coach say to the fat kid? you need to exercise

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Why was the Mexican in pain? Someone hit him with a frying pan 5 times across the face.

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When life gives you lemon, Squeeze lemon juice in life's eyes Rape it And demand oranges

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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Your mom is so dumb that she had a below average score on her IQ test.

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What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

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I don't find blind jokes funny. Honestly, I just can't see the humor in them.

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Yo mama so fat, she suffered a heart attack last week and we are all deeply concerned.

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Why the monkey fall out the tree? Cause he was dead!

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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