rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

What do you call a man who's eating thirty big macs ? Hungry.

Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

Knock, Knock Who's there? The FBI

Who invented apple? God

what is the diference between my left tit and my right tit .... my right one was cut off because of breast cancer

What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

You're so black that other black people make fun of how black you are.

What do u say to someone u don't like? I thought I'd let u no tht I don't like u...

-Why didn't a girl cry after she fell down with her bike? -Because a handlebar pinned her lung.

Whats worse than bieber fever? A yeast infection.

Roses are gold Violets are blue I am color blind

What's better than your mom dying? Chocolate Cake.

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

"You go, Glen Coco" -Mean Girls, 2004

why did the boy die because he got ran over by a tractor

There are 2 carrots sitting in a basket. One carrot says to the other; I'm a carrot! The other carrot does not reply, because carrots do not speak. Now consider the possibility, that the first carrot was a talking monkey.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Women's Professional _________

a blond a her blond boyfriend were walking acrossed a river. she gose over the river but the ramp brecks when she's past. her boyfriend says wait until night and I'll get a flashlight and shine it acrossed get on the light beem and walk acrossed.she says no when I'm haf way acrossed you will turn the light off.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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