John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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how come the exorcist eat crème brülé? because that deserves a carlsburg

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What's the difference between black and white people? One is black.

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Na na na na na Neo! Na na na na na na 'Sporin!

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What's more traumatising than watching your dad raping a man? Watching a man raping your dad.

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Bro my d*ck is like 20 inches. That's not healthy, an erection that big will deprive your brain of too much blood and kill you

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Yo mamma's so fat, that she weighs alot.

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Whats the difference between a fish and whale? Ones bigger than the other.

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If your scared of paedophiles..... grow up

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Sally." "Go away, Sally. I told you I am not interested." Kevin slammed the door on his colleague, as Sally proceeded to find somebody else and move on with her life. Kevin later in life became a drug addict, and got thrown in jail. Sally got married and had four kids, and while she feels bad for Kevin, she is happy with her life.

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What do you call a lot of Chinese people in a confined place? A Chinese urban center.

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Roses are black, Violets are too. I'm colourblind. Stop laughing.

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this is not a drill.

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Knock Knock Who's there The military. We're under attack. The military we're under attack who? Dinos

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politically correct!

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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How do u make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face

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guess what What? Apsolutly nothing

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What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

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What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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Women

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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