You know what really pisses me off? When I drink too much coffee.

A man walks into his house to see his TV is moving. He notices a black man who starts running when he enters. He then calls the police and gives a description of the man. The robber gets placed under arrest.

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Dave. -Dave who? -Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

Q. What happened when a man went to a bar? A. Nothing, The bar was closed.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

Why didn't the Jew laugh at the joke concerning his familial genealogy in relation to WW2? He had orofacial paralysis and was therefore physically incapable of expressing joy through the means of his mouth

If I fly my canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, then how many lollipops does Obama have? None, because dogs can't use flashlights.

Why did the Girl fall of the swing? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's There? Not That Girl

A man and his friend go hunting,one falls in a hole and appears dead. The friend calls 911 and asks what to do, the operator says ok first we need to make sure he's dead. The friend checks his pulse and finds out he is living, then an ambulance is sent and the hunter lives with minor injuries.

Whats hard and long? An erect penile shaft.

whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

John Cena for president

whats the difference between ur mom and my mom? nothing i slept with both of them

What is Osama Bin Laden's favourite colour? Doesn't matter. He's dead.

Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Both your parents are dead John.

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

Q.What do Santa Clause and a grape have in common? A.They both have beards. Except for the grape.

im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...