If you were a pie I'd eat you

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What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck

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Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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What's worse than the haulocost? Not much.

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A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

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a man walked into a bar....

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A gay man walks out of his bedroom, rubbing his ass in pain. He says, "I hate it when I slip and fall in the shower."

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What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

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why did the man fart? because he felt like it.

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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

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what did the addidas sign say to the nike sign? I'm all in

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Q: What did the train say when it sneezed twice? A: Trains are inanimate objects, thus they cannot sneeze or talk. Are you an idiot?

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the boy drop his icecream cone? Because of the shock of seeing his dead family.

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if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? if a tree falls in the forest and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Exactly what he had asked for because UNICEF do a wonderful job.

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How does Cee Lo Green order extra ketchup? Can I have some more ketchup, please?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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