It only takes one drink to get me drunk.

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Your d is so small that when you had a boner and walked into the wall....... YOU BROKE YOUR NOSE! Millimeter Monster bro

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Why doesn't God answer prayers? God does answer prayers, but He does not want you to have everything you want just by asking it, He wants you to work for what you have, everything happens for a reason. ... Nah, it's because God does not exist.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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what do poor black guy and poor white guy have in common..................................................... their poor

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven died three months ago and was clawing on his bedroom window.

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Q. When's The Best Time To Wear A Striped Sweater? A. All The Time.

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A man buys a prius

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What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

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My brownie is so warm and squishy. You know what else is warm and squishy? Freshly killed babyies

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A man spoke in a high-pitched voice. Another man said "Are you gay" He responded, "Why, yes"

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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how many cucumbers dos it take to change a light bulb? none. cucumbers cant change light bulbs. dumbass.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

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Q: what is white and can't climb trees? A: A refrigerator

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what is the color of a burp burple

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

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What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

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A man walks into a bar, gets caught in a knife fight, and dies horribly. The funeral was closed casket.

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A fat cat sits on the ground staring up at a fence. The fence stares down at the cat and laughs.

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REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REDD REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED................................that is all LOL

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What did the cannibal order at McDonalds? Big Mac, extra pickle, hold the mayo.

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Why didn't the little boy have arms or legs? Because they were savagely ripped off of him by a black bear on a very unfortunate camping trip.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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