What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

YES! EXACTLY!

Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

What did the farmer say to the survivor of the plane crash that just crashed on his land? "Need a band-aid?"

Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

How do you blindfold an Asian person? Take a price of cloth and put it over his eyes

why did sally drown cause she was black

Why did a black man bring a baseball bat to a white man's apartment? Because he was stopping by his friends house before heading to a rousing game of baseball.

A seal walks into a club.

Oh wow, I've never seen one that big before. Thats what the 12 year old boy said as he starred at the the Great Pyramid of Pharaoh Khufu.

Poop.

Why does Bugs Bunny have big ears? Because he's a rabbit

If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

Why was the black man forced off of the roller coaster He had heart disease

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

What do you get when you cross a squirrel and a horse? Each animal has a different number of genetic faults therefore such a process would be impossible.

What happens when you mix a camel and a penguin? A cenguin!

non poop

Q. Why did the 8 year girl scream and cry when she was raped? A. I have no idea either. I drugged her and taped her mouth closed.

there was a blonde red head and black they were on misty mountain the black was the smartest so she jumped off and said bird flew like a bird the red jumped and said falcon and glided like a falcon then the blonde the dumb one tripped said oh crap turned into crap and wentt to the bottom and bursted

whats the differences between an atari and a xbox 360 i don't know i'm not a video game nerd

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? It was taped to the other monkey

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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