Your mother is so old, she could easily be considered a senior citizen.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

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How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

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Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

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why was the stone green? I dont know thats why im asking -_-

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How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

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Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

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how do you turn your dishwasher into a garbage disposal? make her take out the trash.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: he was sucidal because his kids hate him and his wife cheated on him.

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What's the worst part about aids? Telling your wife and kids.

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why did jimmy loose the bike race. because he never entered.

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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What do you call a black guy with no hair? Bald

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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Yes, I'll have the cordon bleu, see voo play.

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Why did the blonde ask the doctor if she should get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anal surgery is the only solution.

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why did he cat not land on its feet? it had 2 legs amputated due to cancer and animal abuse

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What do you call a white man who murdered his whole family? -a murder What do you call a black man who raped five women? -a rapest What do you call a Mexican with a leaf blower -a hardworking legal immigrant working twelve hours seven days a week to support his wife and three children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because it never told anyone. Chickens can't talk.

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Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

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How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

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why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? because its probably your bike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops