okay so one time my dog was eating an octopus tail and i was all like...Bro! octopus are our friends dont eat them! then he was all like okay...so later i saw my goldfish eating a blue kangaroo and i was all like bro blue kangaroos are our friends dont eat them and she was all like okay.. so then i saw my sandwich eating itself and i was like bro...let me eat you instead! and it was like okay. then i saw a bear eating you so i was like bro....thats all i said before it ate both of us :( and thats the story of why i have 6 toes on my left buttcheek

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Whats do Hispanics and Blacks have in common? They are both stereo-typically defined and thus the subject of many popular jokes.

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What happened to the guy that took to many lunesta pills? He fell asleep but he was glad it was the weekend or he would have been late for his job

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What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

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why did the goat go up the ladder? because its ladder goat

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Stare at the person nearest to you and say "sprinkles" with the straightest face possible.

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why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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What did the DVD player say when a video tape was put in? You incompatible.

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You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

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A black man goes to his dentist appointment and the doctor asks, have you brushed your teeth today laderius? the black man replies: Yes, but my name is not laderius

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What does a man and an orange have in common? Nothing.

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How you know when dislextic

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Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize? Cos he was out standing in his field!

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Why was the comedian so funny? Because that's his job, and if he wasn't funny he would have to become a hobo.

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Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

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A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Leaves are green, You should know all this by now...

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How many girls does ittake to screw in a lightbulb? Doesnt matter as long as dinner is on the table by 6:00

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Me too.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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The name "Hunter Barksdale".

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax.

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What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? Futurama only has one bender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops