Roses are red violets are blue, I more do like pink like the holes are in you.

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yo momma so stupid she should probably be taken to a specialist as she may have a learning disability.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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Anne frank dies days before camp was liberated.

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What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

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What did the terminally sick child dream of? I dont know. He never woke up to tell me.

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whats wosre than stubbing your toe? being lost on a desert island being raped

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.

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You are so ugly that when u were born, your mom was unable to breast-feed you because she would have to look at your face to do so.

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What's the difference a ham and bugs bunny? -When I see a ham on the dinner table, I eat it. When I see bugs bunny on the dinner table and asks me "what's up, doc?" I stay away from sugar for a while and get tested for heroin

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A Mexican, a black guy, and a Muslim are riding in the back of a car. Who is driving? Their friend Keith.

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What is the black kid down the street getting for his birthday? Well first of all, his name is Pat. And he asked his parents for an Xbox that he will likely receive, and I assume a variety of other gifts from friends and family.

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head on into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Teacher: which vegetable makes your eyes water? Student: Any vegetable. Teacher: How? Student: Just rub any vegetable in your eyes and see what happens.

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what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

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Why did the woman cross the road? To welcome the new neighbors.

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Q. What's worse than 9/11? A. That one shark jumping episode of Happy Days.

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A: Do you like it B: No

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A Native American walks into a bar. The bartender notes that this is statistically unlikely because Native Americans are part of a small minority in the local area, but is accepting of all people so still serves him a drink.

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How many Caucasian American males does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What's the difference between a hipster and a steaming pile of shit? Many things.

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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