How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

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do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

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How do black guys say hi to each other? Hi.

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It's Christmas in Iraq. Merry Christmas

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Knock knock Who's there? The events which followed are described by police as the August 4th massacre in which a family of five were brutally murdered by two prison escapees who broke into the house in search of a place to hideout.

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A woman walks into a bar. Guys aren't the only ones walking into bars.

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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You're momma is so dumb, she has troubles passing her math unit and should seriously consider a math touter

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I was gonna make a joke about a my dick... Racecar

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How many pieces of gum are in 5 gum? 5. i meen 7

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A Native American walks into a bar. The bartender notes that this is statistically unlikely because Native Americans are part of a small minority in the local area, but is accepting of all people so still serves him a drink.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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Q: What's the difference between a grasshopper and pencil? A: Lots

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What is the answer to this joke? Cuz fuck you that's why.

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What's the difference between an eight year old girl and a Jew? Only one comes back from camp.

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how did santa ruin christmas? he didnt put presents under familys tree's

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Q:What did the wall say to the other wall? A: .

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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a blond girl walks into a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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