why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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Your mom is so stupid, she thought the square root of pie was 3.14156

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? What's up

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Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets wasted and forgets the punchline.

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What did the black man say about Linkin Park? That there's obviously a rapist in their midst and they should all be questioned.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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i have a six pack.... of crayons......... just kidding i ate two of them

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Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

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every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute goes by.

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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Why are Pine trees green? Because light reflects at different wavelengths, and the chlorophyll, found in chloroplasts, being abundant in the needles of pine trees, Reflect the correct wavelength for green.

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*knock knock* "Who's there?" "It's the police, I'm afraid your husband was in a car crash and died."

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You know what is funny about r.ape? Nothing. It's horror

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24

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Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

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if you can raed tihs steence it menas you are ceelvr eugnoh to uendnrstad tihs: no sex cusaes dgdoy eeys

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It's April Fool's Day and a little boy runs up to his mom. "Daddy hung himself! He's in the attic!" The mom runs up to the attic, but the dad's not there. The boy looks at his mom and says, "April fools! He's in the basement!"

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What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

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What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

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What's worse than tripping over a tree root? The destruction of the ancient city of Pompeii in A.D. 79. Though tripping over a tree root may hurt and result in the victim bleeding profusely, we live in the 21st century and at any time can call a doctor using a cellular device called a phone. In A.D. 79, no technology in this category existed. People were overpowered by the rage of a mountain that they believed was a sign of the wrath of the heavens. People had to flee the city and a majority of them we killed by either inhaling to much smoke or other causes. This continued for over 18 hours. Therefore, the destruction of Pompeii is far worse than tripping over a tree root.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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