what did the child say to his mother? daddy raped me!

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* Are you afraid of dinosaurs? * No, they're all dead.

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What happens if you roll a nickel down a street in Mexico? It eventually stops and lands on its side.

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Why couldn't the kid eat candy? He had diabetes, so he could put himself in danger and possibly result in death which would leave the family torn apart and all committing suicide in a matter of 10 years.

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Z.

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how do you get all the people in ireland out of their homes? roll a potato down the road. how do you find the richest person in ireland? you find the one who got the patato

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Wait...what?

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Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd have thought one of them would have seen it.

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Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

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Knock Knock? Who's there? EMS - your pregnant wife died it a car crash

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i read the terms of service when i posted this

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- Hi, my name is Sarah Lennon. - Wow! Are you related to Sarah Palin?!

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Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

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Whats bloody and is dead. My son.

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Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

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Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

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After visiting the dentist, Ke$ha had sixteen cavities because brushing your teeth with bottles of jack causes plaque to build up.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

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What did the Dragonfly say to the Mosquito? Nothing. He ate it.

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

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Where's the soap?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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