Why were trash man's hands dirty? He got shot in the leg and desperately tried to get the bullet out with his hands and got blood all over them and ass he was running to the hospital he tripped into shit.

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A man and his friend are talking. The man says, "You know what's funny? Sometimes you mean to say one thing and you say a completely different thing. Like the other day I wanted to buy a ticket to pittsburgh, but the lady I was buying it from had very large breasts, so I accidentally said 'Can I have a picket to titsburgh?'" And the other guy says, "Yeah, man, it's really funny you say that, the other day I meant to ask my wife to pass the salt, and I said 'you whore, you ruined my life'"

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Sally with prosthetic arms.

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why did the packers win the superbowl? because they were very good

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I didn't know that guy did crossfit

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A man went to the doctor, complaining about not feeling well after dancing the night before. The doctor quickly rushed to the surgeon to get ready for the liver transplant that had to take place.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Wh do you call a Zeebra without black and white stripes? A horse

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In Soviet Russia, table flip you! ???? ? /(. - . \?

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a woman votes!

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what do you call a masculine female? a post op transexual

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What african eat for christmas Sand.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally!

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I dyslexic man walks into a bra. This incident had no relation whatsoever to his condition. The bra was just in an unusual and inconvenient location, and he wasn't paying much attention to where he was going.

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Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

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Moral

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What does a baby and a bowling ball share in common? They both displace a similar amount of water.

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Why was the man upset? His entire family was murdered, skinned, separated into assorted body parts, and stapled to trees.

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what is the diference between my left tit and my right tit .... my right one was cut off because of breast cancer

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What is the difference between a baby and a log? I don't have a log in my fireplace

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What did the car do? CRASH!

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On christmas, a bunch of happy kids get machine guns for christmas.Meanwhile in afghanistan, a bunch of dissapointed kids are getting ice skates.

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Why didn't the cat eat its supper? It was dead.

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Is it normal to eat breakfastr in the morning? Yes By Logan in South Dakota

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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