Whats small yellow and cant swim? A short bus full of autistic children.

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Where do you study to get a good education? A library, at home, or at another quiet location where it is easy to concentrate.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are unintelligent creatures of instinct, and can tell no significant differences between the pavement and the road. It was unfortunate that a bus was speeding past at the moment this event happened.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

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Q. Did you hear about the gay guy that's on the patch? A. yeah, that's a really big step, quitting smoking is tough

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Your mother is so nice, I saw her while grocery shopping and we pleasantly chatted. She also remembered my name and invited me to come over sometime and have a snack.

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A. THERE'S SOMETHING ON YOUR FACE B. WHAT?!? *PUNCH* A. IT WAS PAINNNNNNNNN

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what starts with P and ends with u-b-e-s? Paul, can you brang me some priangles and the rest of my Rubik's cubes?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Wrong. Violets should be purple.

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What is red, blue, green, and pink, tie died, and alive? Nothing.

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how come bob felt 'under pressure'? because somebody dropped a dumpster on him

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Shoot her in the head

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What do you call a fridge? A Fridge

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Women's Rights.

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

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Me Chinese Me no joke Me die of cancer.

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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It said i can write my own joke so i did.

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Roses are Gray. Violets are Gray. I am a Dog.

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An Irish guy, a black guy, and an Asian guy walk into a bar. They all caught the plague and died.

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You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

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What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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