knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it did not realize it was a man-made distinction for constructed transportation vehicles and had a coincidental tendency to walk toward the area on the other side to find food or avoid birds flying over.

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Why did the american block the road? Because he just ate at Mc donalds.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? She is a goner.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

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What did the zombie say to the woman? I like turtles.

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justin beiber has a penis hahahahahahhaah lol not really

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How many chickens does it take for a cow to count on Tuesday? The same reason a horse got fired for seven plus one blue red green.

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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What is white and black and red all over.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get KFC... Because hes a canibal!

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what does rain do? think of how happy its life was!

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Someone stopped playing Skyrim.

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What happen's when you give an alcoholic whiskey? He's an alcoholic, so he drinks it.

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I would have buttered my bread, but the pool was cold.

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Q:A man walked into a bar. He looked at everyone and suddenly started crying. Why? A: Because everyone was drunk, and therefore came to the point where no one could remember him or anyone else.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink. What does he order? Nothing. The horse was incapable of speaking English then shat on the floor, kicked over a chair and then left.

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Roses are Red. Violets are blue. I took a shit on your wife's face last night.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He backs up, takes two steps to the right, and walks around the bar rubbing his forehead.

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True or False : it would not cause a public disturbence to express your P0rnagraphy to the public??? true. P0rnagraphy is the freedom of speech and ability to express oneself

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Why did Mufasa miss his doctor's appointment? Because he was trampled to death by wildebeest

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I don't believe in giraffes.

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Moralman... Seriously man, take it easy, my name is Nero, yes I play dual identities sometimes, it is only in order to convey my hidden messages to my people. I am deeply sorry to admit that those that assaulted you where indeed from my order, they have been prosecuted by the law and excluded from our order.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops