Today is March 22.

Q. what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? A. nothing you done told her twice already

What is the black kid down the street getting for his birthday? Well first of all, his name is Pat. And he asked his parents for an Xbox that he will likely receive, and I assume a variety of other gifts from friends and family.

Here is the worst joke ever. ..... Dislike this and you are awesome!! P.S. I'm serious. I want to make a joke with the MOST DISLIKES ever! Don't think this is reverse psychology. I don't do that shi*t.

Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head on into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

Why did the woman cross the road? To welcome the new neighbors.

what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

Teacher: which vegetable makes your eyes water? Student: Any vegetable. Teacher: How? Student: Just rub any vegetable in your eyes and see what happens.

How many pieces of gum are in 5 gum? 5. i meen 7

What is spiky and opens up wide? The Mouth…what were you thinking you perv?

101 ways to annoy people 1.) lying about having a 101 ways to annoy people

Golgo12 here, I can see how some people consider you insane Nero, glad to know point zero is the starting ground of your elysum, that should show them how a modern society should be like. You got six years left to live? That sucks man sorry to hear that. Ur real name is Nero? Axel Knight sounds so much more... You.

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

What did the black man say when he noticed his crack was missing? I guess they fixed the sidewalk while I was at work.

Roses are red Zombies are hungry and blue My brain is half-eaten And what about you?

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeleine mecanne.

Knock knock! Why didn't you use the doorbell?

What is Hitler's least favorite month? July...

How many Caucasian American males does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

Q: What's the difference between a grasshopper and pencil? A: Lots

why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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