Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by Osama.

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*Knock Knock* "Who's There?" "Delivery" "Oh right, I just ordered pizza"

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is in an abusive relationship and drinking her pain away.

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Some people like melon and others like soup.

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Roses are red , Violets Are Blue , i Dont Like rhyming , TITTIES !!

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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what do you call a baby rapest jordan gregg

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Barney is a pedophile Loves dino molestation Stuck a dildo in his ass And died of constipation

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boner

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A: Knock Knock. B:Whose there? A:Jehovah witness!

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A black guy and a white guy both interview for a job. The black guy gets the job because he is college educated and highly qualified.

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

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P1: knock knock P2: go away!!!

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Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

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What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.

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Guess who thinks your pretty? Hellen Keller

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

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whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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Q. How do you make a fruit punch? A. In a punch bowl, mix together fruit punch, pineapple juice and ginger ale. Add scoops of sherbet into the punch. Wait for the sherbet to begin melting, approximately 10 minutes, stir gently, and serve.

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A dog walk into a bar, and the bartender asks, "What"ll it be?" The dog then breaks into tears as he realizes the bartender is his father's gay husband.

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Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

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Chuck Norris and 2 other cowboys were out in the old west. After a long day of travel in the desert, the three of them set up camp for the night. Having sat around their fire silently for some time, the first of the cowboys decided to speak up. "You know," he said, "I believe I am the manliest man here! Why, this one time I was riding all alone through the desert on my manly horse when I stumbled upon a town that had no name. Upon entering the town, I realized that the townspeople were in a panic. Everyone was fleeing for their lives and screaming. So I grabbed the nearest woman to me around the neck and demanded of her, 'What the hell is going on around here?!!!' The woman, terrified, only managed to stammer and point. Low and behold, there was a wild bull skewering people through the heart. So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and grabbed the bull by the horns and looked him straight in the eyes, broke his neck, crushed his testicles, rammed my fist into his chest, pulled out his heart and ate it! That is how much of a man I am!" There was silence quite for a while. Soon the other cowboy cleared his voice and said: "You, know, that's pretty good, but I am more of a man than that! Why, this one time, me and a few of my manly buddies were off on a horse trip. I was bringing up the rear of the line when all of a sudden I heard a commotion at the front of the line. Kicking my fine horse with my spurs, I raced ahead to see what was the matter. Low and behold, there was a twenty-foot rattler that had consumed my friend whole! So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and ran over to the snake, grabbed him around the neck, crushed his testicles, bit off his head, sucked the venom from its cold, lifeless body and then spit it upon the dry ground like acid! That is how much of a man I am!" After this, there was another silence. The two cowboys looked one another over, each recognizing the other to be a fine specimen of what it is to be a man. They then both patiently waited to hear Chuck Norris' response. But there was only silence. Off in the distance an owl hooted. A coyote howled. Still, silence. Chuck Norris didn't say a word; he merely continued to sit calmly and stir the coals of the fire with his penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops