Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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What's gay and nobody likes? Ryan's combover

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Steve

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget!

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You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

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why did jimmy win the lottery? WAFFLE

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If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You like penis, That's what you live up to.

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Whats he difference between a rock and a dead baby? I'm not spemding the rest of my natural life in an insane asylum for eating a rock!

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A man with a broken arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I broke my arm, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

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why did the mexican cross the road? Becuase his other one was stolen by a Black.

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What did the Protoss player say when he lost to a Terran player? I concede defeat. You simply have a greater mastery over the game than I.

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Did you hear about the guy with five penises? Me neither, because that sounds like a very improbable aberration.

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What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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Roses are red, I'm tired... I think I'll lie down now

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i just pooped that is all!

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Why did the Asian guy's condom slip? Because the condom was put on the opposite way.

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I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

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How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red. OH SHIT THE GARDENS ON FIRE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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