Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

What's worse than biting into a worm and finding an apple? Why would you bite into a worm?

What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

What's brown and sticky? A stick

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her.

What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

Q: How do you count the population of Mexico? A: Take a census.

What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

Buzi vagy!

Why did the 100 year old man die? He was really old and his heart stopped beating after his BLT.

What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

so... how about that airplane food

What did the dyslexic say to the nun? When I write, I typically misplace letters in words.

In Soviet Russia life had both pros and cons.

What did the Dementia sufferer get for Christmas?

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute goes by.

My dog got out of it's cage. So I found it and be the shit out of

Why did the boy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus !

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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