There are ten million million million million million million million million million million million sub-atomic particles in the universe that we can observe. Your mamma took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd...

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Who's the biggest badass in the nation? Adrenaline junky Jacobs!

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Your mom is so fat that she has high cholesterol. Moral: I AM NOT CRAZY! Said the man to the dog.

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What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Procedes with his long difficult hunt to find another companion who accepts him for what he is, without the fear of being eaten.

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I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

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Cameron is a r e t a r d

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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What did the man say to the woman? get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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What did the coal miner get for Christmas? Black Lung Disease

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Colon Right Parentheses For all of the confused people out there that's :)

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What mother loved her son so much, she gave him a scar on his forehead for it? Lily Potter.

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What do you call a black man walking on the side of a road? A Pedestrian

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A large Albanian man jizzing on the pile.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

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How many black teachers does it take to figure out 10 x 30. only one shes a very respected teacher

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womans rights...

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Hey I'm You're mother..... Haha Jk you're adopted

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Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

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What do you call a Christmas tree with lights on it? A Christmas tree with lights on it.

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Michel Moor on a die...

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A Pakistani news reader.

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What's funnier than slapping a girl? Calling the cops on the person who slapped her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops