What's the difference between an ice cream cone and a pile of dead babies? I don't cum on the ice cream before I eat it.

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Man, It's so hot in here that the horses name is friday.

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How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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How did the blonde die? She got swallowed whole by a 1,000-foot scorpion.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Hearing the same holocaust joke seventeen times.

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Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

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What do you call a blonde with a Doctorate in Physics? Doctor (Dr).

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What's black and white and red all over? The color spectrum. Along with other colors.

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Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.-South Park

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say cheese

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What did the Black man get after a month's worth of manual labour? A reasonable wage, that was above the national minimum wage standard which states his and everyones right to a certain amount of money

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

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anti-joke.com

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Jimmy and Ted are racing each other at the end ov the street. Jimmy is taller and thinner but Ted has more endurance. Who wins the race? A: the drunk driver

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Why was ticklish Tom not ticklish anymore? A: he got hit by a train

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's rich...

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon, and Michael Jackson is dead....

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So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

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Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

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What did one manicotti say to the other manicotti? I doubt we'll ever know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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