why did the boy die? because he got shot

Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

why was 7 afraid of 8, cause 8,9,10

Three jews walk into a bar. The bar is hosting a bar mitzvah.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

How do u make Michael Jackson cry Dead people can't cry you dumb bitch

1 pack of bacon 2 fat guys. They both die fighting over it.

i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

Why did the blind man die? He had eye surgery and the doctor told him when he first opened his eyes there would be a very bright light, turns out he also had alzheimers and wandered onto the train tracks

Your Mum Is So Dumb, It Took Her 2 Hours To Watch 60 Minutes.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

What did the farmer say to the woodchucks chucking his wood? Excuse me, not to be rude but i worked very hard splitting and stacking that wood and would appreciate it if you would stop throwing it in the water.

what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

why did the little boy cry about his dog, it was hit by a train.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

42

Why did the man commit suicide? Because on top of his depression, his wife had been cheating on him and his kids all died in a horrible hand-gliding mishap.

Roses are Brown Violets are Brown Whos been shitting on my garden??

A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

When is Florida not the sunshine state? At night.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothin. You already told her twice.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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