Q: Why was the black man good at basketball? A: because he practiced

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Roses are red violets are blue suck my **** and I'll **** you too

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Why couldn't the Chinese women see... It's because she just got into a terrible car accident and suffered a rental detachment in both eyes. Follow up question, why was the Chinese women even allowed to drive?

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how did Andrew meet adele He was working as a stableboy

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what did the big chimney say to the little chimney ?? your to young to smoke

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

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Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

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Why did the dyslexic chicken cross the toad? Because the toad mocked his dyslexia, and the chicken does not tolerate rude bastard toads.

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How do you stay out of Heaven? you stay alive.

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This is an anti-anti-joke.

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Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? Nobody, the car is parked while they look at a map for directions because doing that while you are driving would be very dangerous and could result in a collision.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a sprite. Everyone in the bar looks and him funny and then laughs. He then tells them, "I would rather satisfy myself with a cool lemon-lime drink than put the poisonous toxins of alchohol into my blood stream."

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Why is pi? Because circles.

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A man meets the girl of his dreams. Too bad the man will die in 3 days due to terminal cancer

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Knock knock. Who's there? Knock. Knock who? Knock knock.

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DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

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Why did? Yes

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if you dont like sponge bob refrences.......... THEN **DOLPHIN NOISE*** you

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What is similar between women and puzzles? Neither had the right to vote before 1920. Puzzles still don't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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