If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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whats the one about not giving a crap? oh yea this one

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Whats worse than than falling in a puddle on the way to a meeting? Getting shot while your at that meeting.

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Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

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What is the difference between a lion and a tiger? A lion ,on average, weighs 31 kilograms more.

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Whats black,White and Asian? everything we are all equal

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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The eighties called They were pretty exited about inventing a telephone that can call the future

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

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This is supposed to be an anti-joke.

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what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

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Ask me if I'm a car. Are you a car¿ Yes¡

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A black man walks into a bar. His parents were immigrants from South Africa.

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Why did the man not come out of the closet? He wanted to stay in narnia.

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Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

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Knock knock. Who's there? ... Damn knick knockers.

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Why do girls have bumps around their nipples ? -it's brai for suck here .

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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This isn't funny.

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Q: Whats black, white and red all over? A: not me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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