Q: What is a laptop that sings? A: A Dell

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2 men walk into a bar. 3 come out

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What would Martin Luther King Jr. do if he was alive today? Scream at the top of his lungs as he tried to punch out the top of his coffin.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

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What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

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A married couple is arguing over the temperature in their house. The wife wants it at 62 degrees and the husband wants it at 74. What should they do? Nothing while they are arguing their daughter decides to put it at 32 and freeze them to death

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Q. Why did the Unicorn die A. It got hit by a Bus

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

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roses are red violets are blue everyone is stupid how about you? -I'm not Im black

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Knock, knock! Who's there? your enemy your enemy who? your nemesis who was brutally raped and murdered last nigh.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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1d

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Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

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Moby Stick, the Great White Twig

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What did the friend say to the other friend? A. Hi friend.

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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hi joshua

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So how does the chicken cross the road? He doesn't, chickens live on farms.

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Whats green and smells like bacon................. Green bacon

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There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

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What does the color 9 smell like? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops