holly shit!!!! when did i get on the internet !?

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

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What's the worst way to die? Alone.

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How many pieces of gum are in 5 gum? 5. i meen 7

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What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

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Your text.

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What is more boring than watching paint dry? Aids

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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Knock, knock. Who's There? The Fire Department...

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-knock knock -i'm not at home, go away!

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You cant spell chorus with out... Vagina!

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What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

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Why didnt the boy go to school the next day? Because he killed himself due to bullying

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Sometimes when I'm horny, I put vinegar on my diick

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What did the prison inmate get for Christmas? A warm chair to sit in

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Q. what has one million arms and tells it to people A.a liar

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

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I was approached the other day by an officer as he asked... "Son where are your parents?" I replied, "I dont know i'm an orphan" The officer then laughed and walked away

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what did the chicken cross the road? because its a chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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