what do you get when you mix a llama with a ostrich? i dont know

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how do you decrease the unemployment figures? abolish lidle, aldi, and netto

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whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

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What is worst than a1000 baby's stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees.

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What did the Jews say before they got of the bus? Let's make like a Jewish kid's forskin and get the hell out of here.

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Bacon is delcious.

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Q: Why doesn't the young lady speak very much? A: Because she's a whore

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Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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You know what's bad? Running over a baby with a truck. You know what's worse? Skidding on it.

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What is black and goes blub-blub? A black blub-blub. Good job. What is red and goes blub-blub? There is no such thing as a red blub-blub, you idiot.

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Why did the first elephant fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? PEER PRESSURE!

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Why are black people so tall? Because their parents were

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Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grizzly bear in your apple

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What sound does a childs head make in a vice? I don't know, I was too busy wanking.

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Whats an Anti-joke?? A joke that possesses the kind of humor based on the surprise factor of absence of an expected joke or of a punch line in a narration which is set up as a joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC and join his chicken friends to protest.

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Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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Lil' Johnny was happily swinging on the swings when all of a sudden...... ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> FLYING DAGGERS!!!

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Why did Tim sit on the chair? Because potato.

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We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

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How much fun does a gay guy have? A butt load.

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What do you get if you give a black man more than 5 watermelons? Jeff the Killer.

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What did the tree say to the boy? Nothing. As i recall, trees are unable to speak and or show signs of emotion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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