What do a vampire and a ginger have in common they're both afraid of the sunligh- oh wait this anti jokes ohhhhhhh oh well

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

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Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

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What's orange and not an orange? An orange.

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oh hai

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Why can you punish cows but not fish? Because you can ground beef, but not fish!

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An Irishman and an Englishman are in a bar. Suddenly a wild Dragonite attacks. The Englishman promptly catches the pokemon and continues to enjoy his drink with his Irish friend.

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Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

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a mexican guy and a black guy are in a car, who is driving? the mexican, the black guy is in the passenger seat

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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Why would you call a child douche bag? Cause they're sterile

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

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Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

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what do you call a joke that is not a joke? not a joke

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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Why do pokemon have hair? because they have no balls

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

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If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

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Q.What do you call a beaver with a unibrow. A. A beaver........it's still a beaver

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What's the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies is a horrible tragedy.

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What is a dead cat on the side of the road. A free cat.

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Why are bacon and eggs good. Because Toasters are silver

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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