I remember the last words my Grandfather said before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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A black man and two Mexican men are all in the same car, who's driving? One of the Mexicans.

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Rose are Red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you.

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Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and leave.

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What did the mute girl say to the other mute girl?

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Wanker

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Whats worse than 2 babies in a trashcan. 1 baby in 2 trashcans

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A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Patient: I thonk I'm gonna die Doctor: well will ya hurry up and die already? I've got to treat a kid with a paper cut.

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What does Helen Keller order at McDonalds? Food.

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Your mother is so fat she has trouble finding clothes in her size.

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Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

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What did the Mexican guy get for christmas? Deported

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a jewish man with a boner walks into a wall what does he hit first his cheek due to the fact he was looking at an attractive woman

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Bad grammers.

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why do i have a pain in my left side i dont know but im scared

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

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How was a blonde woman able to get into Harvard? She was smart and had a very good SAT score.

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knock knock... whose there? I don't know why don't you open it and find out dumb ass... Gosh people and their common sense these days!!

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realising the apple is the worm...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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