Whats the similarity between your mom and me We are both men except for your mom

What's sad about 5 black men falling off a cliff? The master has no slaves.

Wanna know something funny? Your face

What's black and white and red all over? A bloody zebra.

Hello.

When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

why cant helen keller drive? because cars werent popularly accepted when she lived.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

What is worse than finding an Apple in your Worm? Watching your dog jumping of a cliff

A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

Why did the cat land on it's back.... because its dead .......

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grizzly bear in your apple

OK. so a guy walks up to another guy and says hi. The other guy said nothing. The other guy said hi again. The guy said nothing The guy got really mad and slapppeed him across the face. Finally the man said PURPLE RABBID COMPUTER TREES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and walked away while liking his blue brick.

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas?... A warm meal, a shower, and a place to sleep courtesy of the local homeless unit.

Q. What time is your appointment with the Chinese dentist? A. 20 past 4

Womens rights !

So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

Why did the man's motorcycle not move when the street light turned green? Because it was a filing cabinet.

how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

Papa Smurf: Why did the chicken cross the road? Grouchy Smurf: I hate chickens!

12 in general

A chemist and his buddy walk into a bar. The chemist, trying to sound smart, says, "I would like a glass of H20." The buddy, being a normal person who actually cares if he looks like an idiot, asks for plain water.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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