Why was maddison sad Becasue he was born with a fucking gay name

Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

A man walks into a bar gets drunk passes out then goes to rehab because he has a problem

a dad farts in the woods nothing else happens

What's the difference between a woman and the Universe ? One is full of mysteries mankind may never understand, the other is, well, the Universe.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

How do you tell if a girl is pregant? Stick a banana up her vagina pull it out and see if it has a bite on it

What time is it? 20:45.

Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

A fat guy eats a twinkie.

Evolution is real. Why? Pikachu evolves.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

Q) What's worse than getting dumped by text? A) Getting hit by a fridge.

Whats a Quires favorite type of sport?--- A contact sport

Where did Ann go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

Why was Adam sad? His wife found him cheating with several women which led to a lengthy and messy divorce and him losing custody of his two children and his house.

What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

Why was the mom crying? Her son was found in the oven.

Why couldn't Timmy ride a bicycle? Because Timmy was a goldfish

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

Knock knock. Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who? (smell my poo)

How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the other side Why did the lollipop cross the road ? It was stuck to the chicken's head Why did the chicken commit suicide ? He couldn't get the lollipop off its head

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...