Why is Michael Jackson bad at checkers? Cause he's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. So was my son after I beat him to death.

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a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

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wow such mark very mark many mark so mark

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Why did the black man smell really bad? A: becuase he ran out of paper

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Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

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Two men are fighting in a boxing match. One gets punched in the crouch, cries, and goes home to watch "The Simpsons".

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Is Charlie Sheen bi-polar? Yes.

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Did you know that if you get all your intestines, and laid it out across the floor in a line, you would die?

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How do you kill a ninja? Shoot it.

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What do you get when you put the head of a lion on the body of an eagle?2 dead animals and a fine for killing protected species.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet. The man who wrote this, Was high as shit.

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why did the little boy die? He had AIDS

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a man is running away

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what do you call a starfish living 500 miles under the sea? A starfish.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need a job Stop spitting on me

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Knock knock Who's there? You Whoa...

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Throw your crépe right into an ocean Where an octopus can get it in all the commotion With the crépe and the ocean and the oc-to-pus

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yo mama so stupid that when she stared at an orange jucie carton for 20 minutes cause it said consatrate

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What is 5 brittish guys who can't sing and horrible music make .... one direction

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

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What's the difference between a bird and a fish ? They're both different, except the fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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