Hey how is your wife and my kids

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What would you call the Flinstones if they were black? Niggas

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That is so sweet of you, for a moment I thought I had said something that might have insulted you, but then again, considering the length of the message I see why it took so long.

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Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your hair smells nice, especially when woven into a sweater.

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Whats the similarity between a rabbit and a grape? There both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The Police, your mother just died of bowel cancer.

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A man and a friend are playing golf one day. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: "Wow! That is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You are truly a kind man." The other man replies, "Yeah, well, we were married 35 years."

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Hi

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What did the lone KKK member do when he passed 10 large, muscular black men in the street? He did not tell them that he was a member of the KKK.

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Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

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Why did the moogle cross the road? Kupo kupo kupopo!

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why is pie good. because it just is.

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree, He was dead

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer we're both lawyers

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How do you turn a broken skateboard into a gleaming Rolls Royce? With magic.

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What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

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How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

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What happens if Chuck Norris meets a Transformer? Nothing. They would converse, then go their separate ways. Or Chuck would get killed. Horribly.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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What are the last words of a child dieing of cancer ? Nothing because he is to ill to speak

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what did the boy with no hands get for christmas Gloves!!! just kidding i dont know he hasnt opened the box yet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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