Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers!

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I dont know, are you a tomato?

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Bum: Excuse me, can you spare some change? Rich man: No

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How did the blind man watch T.V? With the captions on.

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Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

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knock knock who's there?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobel Nobel who? There was no bell, that's why I'm knocking you idiot

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible

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A black guy walks into a bar. He falls unconscious and an ambulance is quickly called to bring him to the hospital.

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Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

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Why did the astronaut drop his toolbox? Because he ran out of air.

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Black Person Eating Fried Chicken

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Yeah right loser!

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Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

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what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

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Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

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How do you make a basketball team short You cut off their legs

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They say the human body is comprised of 70% water, it's more like... 60% because I'm dehydrated if know what I'm saying... I should really drink some water.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? NOT SALLY

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What's worse than finding out you have cancer? Not much, that would not be so great.

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Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

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Why did the blond couldn't put a piece of meat into her mouth? Because she was vegetarian.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBO... nope bin laden

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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