Why are there no swimming pools in Mexico? The average yearly income is $3,523, and pool chemicals are very expensive.

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What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? The World Trade Center wasn't ruined by clumsiness.

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how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

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what do you call a man with no penis? what ever his name is

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Why did the penguin die? He was anti-social and would rather die than huddle. So he died. THE END

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What did the zebra say to the giraffe? Nothing, they can't talk dipshit.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he didn't have the guts.

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whats a willy? -brock

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When life gives you lemons make lemonade, when life gives you apples make apple juice, when life gives you cranberries make cranberrie juice and then when live gives you mangos, Eat them :)

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Why did 0 dislike 1? Because 1 made 0 feel like he was nothing

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An Asian walks into a bar, but the bartender asks him to leave the bartender replies "we're closing soon" but he secretly harbored racist views that he had not yet come to terms with and was deeply ashamed of.

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A Christian asks God why there is so much pain and suffering in the world. Everyone around him moves away from the grown man talking to his imaginary friend.

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What has a head but can't see? A penis.

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knock knock who's there?

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her in the head.

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What do you call a black man with a PhD and loving family? A nigger

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once upon a time there was a boy

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible

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Who lost World War II? The Jews.

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Why do pokemon have hair? because they have no balls

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What's black, white and red all over? Nothing, I'm colourblind.

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You're so ugly you got rejected from the zoo.

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What happened when the young boy farted. It smelled. :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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