*DRRRRIN* Finally someone uses the doorbell.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely ask him to come down

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Your momma is so fat that when she fell over, she couldn't get back up without help, and she probably got several bruises.

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Why can't Jimmy talk? He's dead.

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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What has four legs and starts with the letter D? A cow.

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cancer

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Q.What do you call a black man flying a plane? A. A black pilot you racist bastard

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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A black guy walks into his bar. So he pays his tab and couldn't have been more coureious.

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why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? lettuce lettuce who? Lett-uce be friends

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Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

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What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

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Roses are blue violets are red I think I'm getting drunk get me to my van

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four nazis are walking towards this jew. as soon as the first nazi came in arms reach of the jew he and his friends started to maliciously hug the jew.......................................and then 20 years later they killed his family.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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What is pink, female and has two dicks? A mother with two sons, both called Richard.

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What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an abosolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Went to a zoo there was a asian shouting GOOZILLA at the reptile house I said no 2 frickly pickles please He said helwo I'm wo pong th pow wice to weet you I said does he come with subtitles Old priest said no the said hello little boy want a mint I said oh thanks I'm not a boy I'm 19 Old priest said no no you can't have one of my special mints I said wait those mints have R's on them are the rainbow mints Old priest no there raspberry I said ok don't be a stranger Old priest said oh I will I said wait your THE PRIEST He said oh I'm just a priest looking for little boys I said no your dead now jumped 30 feet in the air sat on a bird dove into him bird went threw him we made a team promised to clean the world of evil only to find out that we killed the mother of all priest Bird said tweak tweak I said yeah let's hunt them all down Shall the be a part 2 you decide

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it with an axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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