Whats the diffrence between a boy scout and a Jew? The boy scout comes back from camp.

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Did you know that if you stacked enough elephants to reach from the earth to the moon, all those elephants would die?

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What did the retarded asian dolphin eat for breakfast? A big bowl of shit

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, he can't come anyway.

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What do you call a joke without a punchline?

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#Hanging Degus

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So like i was like 3 and I was like stupid or something I was only three, come on! three

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What's white and sticky? A glue stick.

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Q: Why is the earth round? A: I am Batman.

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I like big butts and I cannot lie. You don't know that. I may enjoy skinny butts. I may be lying.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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What's red and hurts your teeth. Answer: a brick

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THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

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How did the snail travel around the world without any help from a transportation device? Sadly, it didn't. The snail is incapable of this kind of long distance travel due to it's small size, lack of speed and short lifespan.

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Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

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How do you kill a Chinese man? There are many ways, all of which are horrible

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

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What do you call 200 black people dead in the ocean? It's a start.

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Have you ever seen Hellen Keller's house? Well it was really nice.

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How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a piece of chicken? They were once both alive and innocent. I lied about the black guy.

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"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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