Guess what! what haha u listened to me

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How did Swiper steal Dora's stuff? He shot her and then took her backpack.

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What are pirate movies rated ? P.g 13 for violence and coarse language.

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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"Free to play" Play free "right now"

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Hi.

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the police there was several calls from people in the sarounding area who heard screaming from ur basement

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So there are 5 people on a plane the president, a movie star, and man who is on the verge of making world peace, the smartest man in the world, and the pope the piolt has a heart atack at and the plane will crash soon there are only 4 parachutes. So the first is Obama and he saysI won a Nobel piece prize and I run American see ya later and he takes the parachute next Steven hawking says sory pope Im taking this because I don't believe in God and black holes are cool so he takes the parachute and jumps out. Next Charlie Sheen says I need to entertain people and keep the drug dealers in business so he. Takes the parachute and jumps out. Then Francis turns to the hippie and says if you achive world peace it may help eliminate some poverty so you take the last paratute and jump out then the hippie says in return no its OK Steven Hawking took my back back. When they land they decide to serch for Steven's body and they find nothing. You see Steven Hawking had taken his own paratute with him and took the Hippies backpack to sell it and make some money

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Death is inevitable.

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Your mom is so fat...

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yo mama so fat she has diabetes.

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A man walks into a bar and the barenter says, "What'll it be?" The man says, "I'll take a Bud Light."

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Yo momma's so fat, she had a heart attack and is currently hospitalized.

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Knock Knock! Well come on in!

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Why do gay guys like push pops? Because they are a delicious lollipop treat.

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Why did the autopilot of a plane malfunction even though the pilots had engaged the switch? The pilots had taken manual control. I lied about the switch.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

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There once was a man in Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He awoke with a fright In the middle of the night To find that someone was breaking into his house

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Q: Why didn't the boy go to school? A: It was the weekend.

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Why did John kill Maris? Because Maris killed his family.

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Q: Why didn't the mexican get into the bathtub? A: He was already clean

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Why couldn't the asian man drive? He had no arms.

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What's purple and has four wheels? A frog, except for the purple and four wheels part.

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What has wheels and flies? A wheel that I have altered so it can fly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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