Wanna know something fishy? A fish

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

whats 2+2? 4

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the fat man with scissors do? Cut off the foreskin of your penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The bartender is institutionalized for paranoid schizophrenia.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

"jrfevkhbgjk" said the retard.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A hispanic lesbian couple accidentally walk into a country western themed bar. And leave immediately as a bar is no place for their 2 year old son.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? Push 1000 Ethiopians off a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats horny and big A dick minus the big part!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There where ducks sitting in the bath One Duck truns to the other an says "could you pass me the soap" The other duck truns and replies "dont call me toast"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't Billy have legs? Because he's a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Jerry Sandusky prefers twenty eight year olds. 20 eight year olds.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the dog kill the fish? He had no reason, he just wanted fish. What, you thought he had like, a vendetta? pssh your crazy

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what's brown and sticky? a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are Black. Violets are Green. im going to go cut myself now

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What has legs but can't walk? A paralyzed man.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats white and lives in a tree a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops