The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

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What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

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Why did the man bring the computer to the doctor because it had a virus

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

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What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

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A seal walks into a club.

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The bartender says ok, then hands him a pistol, then the man shoots the bartender and kills him.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

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why did the baby cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken -written by sion dafydd jones, uk

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What is cold? Winter

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A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

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Two Blondes walk into a bar. They each enjoy a refreshing drink before heading home to greet their family

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A muslim gets on a plane. He is then flown to his destination.

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A Black man a Chinese man and a Jew walk in to a bar. Black man: nice place they got here Asian man: yeah I remember when it used to be that old hardware store Jew: Henry's, i think it was called Aisian man: must have been there for at least 10 years or so

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What did the man say to the drug dealer? I'd like some drugs

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What did one chimney say to the other chimney. Nothing, chimneys dont talk.

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What is black and white and red all over? A Zebra that has been fatally maimed by a hungry lion.

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Q: whats the fastest way to a woman's heart? A: A knife to the ribs...

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, All you HATERS of Bieber, Go sick your mother.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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Why did the dog have 2 legs? he got cut in half.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a rapist.

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Why doesn't Lebron James have any rings? Cuz he didn't win a championship.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops