Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Guess what these words are: boo_s p_n_s _ _ ndom s_x fu_k wan_er Answers: books,pants,random,six,funk,wander.

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The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

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The bear woke up after his long hibernation of the winter. "Boy, am I hungry!" The bear wandered around and ate some berries. "These blackberries are too bitter and unripe for my taste, I'll go eat something else." He stumbled upon a honeybee hive and took some honey out and ate it. He was swarmed and stung by many of those bees. "That wasn't my favorite batch of honey, I'm still pretty hungry, let me go find some other food. He came across a cabin in the woods. "There maybe some food in there." To some, this was known as the Northern Vermont Massacre. It was a tragic happening. The 7 membered family, the Hernandez family, all died that day. The bear chase all of the adult and children and the house and brutally ate them.

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

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You know how to torture Hellen Keller? -No. Put a plunger in the toilet.

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Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

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What's worse than molding bread? Babies in the toaster.

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Your mother is so stupid that she has an IQ score that is much lower than the average person.

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Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

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On Friday the 13th,I had one of those dreams of when you go to school in your underwear. I then realised it wasn't a dream.

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why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

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Straight men can be bronies.

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

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An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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why did the chicken cross the road? orange you glad I didn't say banana

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What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country.

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Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops